It Sucks To Be Me

In gaming as in life

2007-08-03T10:44:00.000-07:00

So you play by the rules, you stick out a helping hand to the other guy, and he flips you off. In gaming, as in life, as this gamer ruefully says, it sucks to be that guy.

Gary Coleman "It Sucks To Be Me" Award

2007-08-01T06:39:00.000-07:00

There's always someone who deserves the "It sucks to be you" award. So to launch the award, what could be better than today's item about Gary Coleman himself. Every time we think, "Man, it sucks to be me" we simultaneously think that there are others who it more sucks to be. Again, with a bow to Avenue Q, let me point out that it continues to suck to be Gary Coleman, cited for disorderly conduct after yelling at his girlfriend in a public parking lot. As if its not bad enough that someone has to follow you around recording those moments when you are not, perhaps, your best self, they must also cite in each new story the litany of shame from past stories. It does suck to be Gary Coleman.

But wait, while in the world view of those living on Avenue Q, Gary Coleman's woes surpass all others, in our larger world there are perhaps people it sucks more to be. Please send me your links, and post to the comments, examples of people it sucks more to be for the "Gary Coleman It Sucks to be Me Award."

Historical footnote: It once sucked to be David Hume

2007-07-30T11:57:00.000-07:00

George W. Bush sustains himself with the knowledge that many men, who once it sucked to be, are now favored by history. I love this, by David Hume, April, 1776.

"I was, I own, sanguine in my expectations of the success of this work. I thought that I was the only historian, that had at once neglected present power, interest and authority, and the cry of popular prejudices; and as the subject was suited to every capacity, I expected proportional applause.

But miserable was my disappointment: I was assailed by one cry of reproach, disapprobation, and even detestation: English, Scotch, and Irish, Whig and Tory, churchman and sectary, freethinker and religionist, patriot and courtier, united in their rage against the man, who had presumed to shed a generous tear for Charles 1 and the Earl of Strafford; and after the first ebullitions of their fury were over, what was still more mortifying, the book seemed to sink into oblivion. Mr. Miller told me, that in a twelvemonth he sold only forty-five copies of it. I scarcely, indeed, heard of one man in the three kingdoms, considerable for rank or letters, that could endure the book."
From "My Own Life" by David Hume, April 18, 1776

But for the breakout of war between France and England, Hume notes, "I had certainly retired to some provincial town of the former kingdom, have changed my name, and never more have returned to my native country."

But, like Bush, Hume was congenitally inclined to optimism in times when it sucked to be he, so he didn't retire and we now have his delightful Essays. Let's hope something just a fraction as good survives to cast a better light on this administration.

Man struck by lightening for the second time

2007-07-30T11:08:00.000-07:00

Thanks to Snowflakes in Hell for this item--man struck by lightening for the second time! He must feel marked by God, or nature. That sucks! The next time someone too lightly dismisses your anxiety about an unlikely event as unwarranted or your risk appraisal as overwrought, just remember, lightening has indeed struck the same person twice!

Well, at least it doesn't suck to be him anymore

2007-07-30T10:32:00.000-07:00

In Grand Rapids today, a man dies at his own going away party, where his family planned to say goodbye before he left Michigan to take a trucking job that he hoped would save his home from foreclosure. Double D'oh!

It sucks to be that guy from Waco!

2007-07-30T07:09:00.000-07:00

Well, it generally sucks to be from Waco, but wow, it sucks to be the victim of a guy who drove across the country to burn your house down over an online flame war. See this contribution from TechDirt!

It sucks to be me!

2007-07-28T15:37:00.000-07:00

With many thanks to Avenue Q--they were really on to something! Is there anybody here it doesn't suck to be? I thought I would find out. This will be a blog devoted to all the people it sucks to be. I hope that means there's a place for everyone! Are you incarcerated, or do you have an embarrassing wart? Did you get stuck in the airport, stuck in traffic or stuck in a bad relationship? I'm quite sure it sucks to be you--at least sometimes.

Recent literature indicates that it particularly sucks to be twenty-something these days, but I'll stick with Daniel Gross of Slate. In "The it sucks to be me generation," he reminds us all that it sucks to be twenty something, whenever you were twenty something. Everyone is the "it sucks to be me generation!"

Starting with me (of course); it sucks to be me. I like watching TV at the end of a long day, but these days TV is really bad. Game shows, reality shows, shows inviting us to vote for America's best invention or dance routine or model or video or stand up comic. Formulaic cop shows, formulaic sitcoms. Hundreds of channels and nothing on. Jon Stewart and Steven Colbert took two weeks off. ARGH! It sucks to be me!

It definitely sucks to be Patty--in bed with nausea and vertigo.

It sucks to be Deontae, a football player.

And it really sucks to be this gal, trying to lose weight.

It sucks to only get four hours of sleep a night and have another night of work ahead.

JT has a broken tooth. Man, it sucks to be him.

"The Guy" ate a good onion bagel with bad cream cheese. And Special K had to wait on the tarmac for 45 minutes before he could get off his plane at LAX.

It appears there will be no shortage of material for a blog.

But sometimes, it really sucks to be you, or you know someone it sucks to be. Post your story to the comments or send me an email!